Self-Test: Is There Enough Love and Respect in Your Relationship?

Val Baldwin, CPC
Live Your Ultimate Life
www.valbaldwin.com

John Gottman, Ph.D. Why Marriages Succeed or Fail

Answer yes or no to each of the following statements, depending on whether you mostly agree or disagree.

1. My partner seeks out my opinions.   Yes  No
   
   
2. My partner cares about my feelings.   Yes  No
   
   
3. I don't feel ignored very often.   Yes  No
   
   
4. We touch each other a lot.   Yes  No
   
   
5. We listen to each other.   Yes  No
   
   
6. We respect each other's ideas.   Yes  No
   
   
7. We are affectionate towards one another.   Yes  No
   
   
8. I feel that my partner takes good care of me.   Yes  No
   
   
9. What I say counts.   Yes  No
   
   
10. I am important in our decisions.   Yes  No
    
    
11. There's lots of love in our relationship.   Yes  No
    
    
12. We are genuinely interested in one another.   Yes  No
    
    
13. I just love spending time with my partner.   Yes  No
    
    
14. We are very good friends.   Yes  No
    
    
15. Even during rough times, we can be empathetic.   Yes  No
    
    
16. My partner is considerate of my viewpoint.   Yes  No
    
    
17. My partner finds me physically attractive.   Yes  No
    
    
18. My partner expresses warmth towards me.   Yes  No
    
    
19. I feel included in my partner's life.   Yes  No
    
    
20. My partner admires me.   Yes  No
    
    
    Scoring: If you checked "yes" to fewer than 7 items, then it is likely you are not feeling adequately loved and respected in your relationship. You need to be far more active and creative in adding affection to your relationship.